By: Nikki Spalaris

Okay, everyone... I think it’s time to "have the talk.” What talk, you ask? The etiquette one. This one is not about table manners or wearing white after Labor Day. No, this one is about a nasty addiction. An addiction that is so viral and yet complacent to the norm that we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Well, we see a light, it’s just a shame that it’s the one glaring from the screen of your phone!

Not that long ago I attended an acoustic performance at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville, TN. The stage was set with a piano and one lonely microphone up front. From the set-up, you would gather that the performer would be alone or at the least have someone accompanying him at some point. All of which should tell you that this would be a very intimate and focused show. I just wish someone would have told the four girls in front of me that while they held up their cell phones with the screen light shinning like Rudolph’s nose in my eyes and the tap-tap-tap of their acrylic nails upon the keyboard. As I tried (and believe me I tried) to listen and focus on the artist, I couldn’t help but want to get up and ask him to pause briefly so the girls could finish their text conversation and switch the phones off.  The question is why did it have to come to that? Where is the consideration? Where is the responsibility and respect shown to the artist by giving them your undivided attention? And furthermore, why are you having a conversation with anyone, present or not? The Ryman is not exclusive to this form of abuse, it happened at the Schermerhorn Symphony Hall as well. From my balcony seat, I could see cell phones lighting up from the seats below like fireflies on a warm summer night. There was no way not to be distracted or annoyed by adults who should know better.

Between the lines at the supermarket, the coffee shop, or fast food places, you have taken the liberties of standing behind others and letting them or anyone within earshot know about your schedule, your sickness, or the latest gossip about your BFF. That being said, I can always choose to leave my place in line or just leave the establishment altogether and take my business elsewhere. But as a society overloaded with useless information on a day-to-day basis, why is it seemingly impossible to just choose to stop talking and be attentive for a little while, especially when the venue, literally, calls for it? Maybe people will feel left out if they don’t know the latest gossip or come off as irresponsible if they don’t take a phone call or respond to an email immediately. But by doing so, they risk interfering with someone else’s good time and are just irresponsible. Frankly, you look more ridiculous than important. If it’s that important to text, take it out into the hallways and away from everyone who paid the same money as you and wants to actually have a good time. No checking your phone inside at your seat either! Go outside, period!

A friend of mine said that texting and tweeting setlists during a show was a great way to touch base with fellow fans and good for artist to build and strengthen their community. I completely agree with that as long as it’s the proper artist, venue, and the kind of show being performed. A Green Day show, fine, U2 - no problem, Barry Manilow, hey, I’ll dance at The Copa Cabana while texting! But then there are the shows that truly deserve your respect and attention. I think you would find it unnerving and rude if someone deliberately took a phone call or starting texting when you are delivering a proposal that had you spending so many sleepless nights putting it together. It’s time to show and to give some respect to artist and the audience around you.

Now, about those white pants you have on….

Nikki Spalaris has been involved within the music industry for 23 years and counting, working directly with artists for the past 10 years.  Spalaris relocated from Pittsburgh, PA to Nashville, TN five years ago to be in direct contact with the music industry and artists and continues to work with different artists on various levels.